Ass Full of Caulk

  • Season 3
  • Aired 01/05/2011
  • 24,636 Views

A girl dies from her faulty ass implants.

- COULD YOU JUST MAKE ITAS BIG AS YOU POSSIBLY CAN?

announcer: TINA'S NOT TALKINGTO HER LOVER.

SHE'S TRYING TO GETTHIS PHONY PLASTIC SURGEON

TO GIVE HER THE MOTHEROF ALL BOOTY-SHAKING BUTTS.

WHY?

BECAUSE TINA WANTS TO GRABTHE ATTENTION OF LITTLE RON,

A RAPPER WHO'S HADA STRING OF HITS

ALL BASED AROUNDONE COMMON THEME...

- ♪ BIG FAT BOOTY

- ♪ BIG FAT BOOTY, BOOTY

- ♪ I WANT A BUTT WITH GIRTHTHAT WOBBLES THE EARTH ♪

♪ I WANT A BUTT SO FATTHAT I CAN HAVE MY CAT ♪

[cat yowling]

- ♪ BIG FAT BOOTY

♪ BIG FAT BOOTY, BOOTY

announcer: TINA ALREADYMADE ONE ATTEMPT,

BUT IF YOUR BUTT ISN'TCERTIFIED GRADE "A,"

BEYONCE-ALICIOUS...

- YOU GO AHEAD ANDTAKE THAT SOMEWHERE ELSE.

announcer: LITTLE RONWON'T EVEN LOOK YOUR WAY.

- GIRL, IT AIN'T GOTNOTHIN' ON THIS, OKAY?

COME ON, BOO.

announcer:THAT'S WHY WE FIND TINA

IN A SHABBY HOTEL ROOM,

GETTING HER GLUTEUS MAXIMIZEDWITH SILICONE INJECTIONS.

THIS WASONE WHITE SUBURBAN GIRL

DESPERATE TO GAIN ENTRANCEINTO THE BLACK HIP-HOP WORLD.

- I HEAR STORIESABOUT LOTS OF PEOPLE

GOING TO LOTS OF EREMES

THAT AN AVERAGE INDIVIDUALMIGHT NOT DO

TO BRING ABOUT THISIDEALIZED UNION THEY HAVE

WITH THIS IDEALIZED PERSON.

IN THEIR MIND, IT'S VIRTUALLYLIFE OR DEATH.

announcer: UNFORTUNATELYFOR TINA,

THE DOCTOR WAS A FRAUD.

HE WAS INJECTING NOT SILICONEBUT COMMON BATHROOM CAULK

DIRECTLY INTOHER BUTT CHEEKS.

LATER THAT NIGHT,

TINA WAS READY TOKNOCK LITTLE RON'S EYES OUT.

SHE HAD AN ULTERIOR MOTIVE.

- GUESS WHO'S BACK.

announcer:SHE WAS A SONGWRITER

AND WANTED HIM TO HEAR HERNEW TUNE, CHEEK FREAK.

LITTLE RON WAS ON HERLIKE WHITE ON RICE.

BUT TINA HAD NO TIME TOWAG HER NEW BUTT IN VICTORY.

SHE STARTED FEELINGILLER THAN ILL,

AND IN 60 SECONDSWENT FROM BAD TO WORSE

TO DROPPING DEAD RIGHT THEREON THE DANCE FLOOR.

TURNS OUT, THE QUACKACCIDENTALLY INJECTED

SOME OF THE CAULK DIRECTLYINTO HER BLOODSTREAM.

THE LUMPY PASTEFORMED AN EMBOLISM

WHICH BLOCKEDHER PULMONARY ARTERY,

CAUSING RESPIRATORY FAILUREAND HEART ATTACK.

TINA WANTED TO JUMP ONLITTLE RON'S BOOTY BANDWAGON,

BUT HER BUTT CAME UP SHORT.

SO SHE PUMPED UP ITS VOLUMEAND WOUND UP BUTTED OUT.

- ♪ I WANT TOSHAKE MY BUTT ♪

♪ MY BIG BUTT IN YOUR FACE

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