Treadkill

  • Season 3
  • Aired 08/15/2011
  • 12,907 Views

A lecherous husband is ogling his young neighbor when he's killed by his own treadmill.

announcer: A HOT SUMMER DAYCALLS FOR A HOT CAR WASH...

AND STACY KNEW HOWTO WORK A HOSE.

WHILE STACY AND HERBOYFRIEND JAKE

WERE GETTING THINGSNICE AND WET,

THEIR NEIGHBOR CHUCK WAS PERVINGOUT WHILE WORKING OUT,

TRYING TO CARVE SOME FAT OFFHIS PUDGY FRAME.

- WHEW!YOU KNOW YOU WANT IT.

announcer: CHUCK WASA SOCIAL ZERO.

WOMEN WOULD RUN, NOT WALK,AT THE SIGHT OF HIM.

- WORK IT FOR DADDY.WOO-HOO-HOO-HOO!

announcer: HE WAS FORCEDTO GET HIS KICKS BY SPYING.

- [chuckles]WHAT A PIECE OF--

MMM!

- 75% OF PEOPLE WORK OUTAT A GYM,

WHILE 25% OF PEOPLE WORK OUTAT HOME.

ONE REASON WHY A PERSON WOULDDECIDE TO TRAIN AT HOME

RATHER THAN GO TO A PERSONALTRAINING STUDIO OR A GYM

IS SIMPLY BECAUSETHEY ARE EMBARRASSED

OF THEIR CURRENT PHYSIQUEAND THEY DON'T

WANT TO BE SEENIN PUBLIC TRAINING.

- YOU COULD CRACK A NUTWITH THOSE THIGHS.

WHEW!

announcer: TODAY,CHUCK WAS SO DEEP

INTO HIS FANTASY SEX LIFE...

- SQUIRT THE HOSE.SQUIRT THE HOSE.

[chuckles]

announcer: HE DIDN'T NOTICETHE SPEED INCREASING

ON HIS TREADMILL.

- BUNS OF STEEL.

announcer: CHUCK WAS ABOUTTO REACH THE FINISH LINE WHEN...

- OH, YEAH!

announcer: HIS HOODIE STRING GOTCAUGHT IN THE CUP HOLDER.

IF IT HAD SNAPPED,HE'D STILL BE ALIVE.

BUT IT STRETCHED OUTTIGHT AROUND HIS THROAT.

- WITH THE STRINGOF HIS SWEAT SUIT

WRAPPED AROUND HIS NECKACTING LIKE A GARROTE,

THE WEIGHT OF HIS BODYPULLING IT TIGHT

CUT OFF HIS AIR SUPPLYTHROUGH HIS TRACHEA

AND CUT EVEN DEEPERINTO HIS CAROTID ARTERIES,

CAUSING LOSS OF AIR AND BLOOD,CAUSING DEATH.

announcer: CHUCK WAS A LOSERWHO TOOK TO SPYING TO GET OFF.

- LOOK AT THAT BUTT.

announcer: BUT THEN HE COULDN'TGET OFF HIS TREADMILL...

- OH, YEAH!

announcer: AND GOT LIFE'SULTIMATE CLIMAX--DEATH.

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