Shafted

Do you ever get on an elevator and wonder 'what if?'

[elevator bell rings]

- HOW IS IT--

announcer: DO YOU EVER GETON AN ELEVATOR

AND WONDER, "WHAT IF"?

THAT'S WHAT HAPPENEDTO HEATHER

AND SHE WAS EXTREMELYCLAUSTROPHOBIC.

- I NEED TO GET OUTOF HERE NOW.

- A PHOBIA ISAN IRRATIONAL FEAR.

IN THEIR MIND,THEY'RE HAVING ALL SORTS

OF SCENARIOS PLAY OUTOF, "WHAT WILL HAPPEN

IF THIS ELEVATOR STOPS?"

AND, "WHAT WILL HAPPENIF I CAN'T GET OUT?"

announcer: BESIDESCLAUSTROPHOBIA,

THERE'S ANOTHER THING YOU NEEDTO KNOW ABOUT HEATHER.

- ALL RIGHT, WELL, YOU'VEDISAPPOINTED ME AGAIN.

announcer: SHE WAS A MAJORBITCH ON WHEELS.

- DID YOU EVEN GO TO COLLEGE?

BECAUSE THIS IS KIND OF AWFUL.

announcer: HER NASTYCRUEL STREAK

AND RELENTLESS AMBITIONHAD BROUGHT HER

TO THE TOP OF THE COMPANY,BUT SHE LEFT

A TRAIL OF RESENTMENTIN HER WAKE.

- SHE SLEPT WITH HIM AND NOWSHE'S COMING IN HERE

AND JUST CHANGING EVERYTHING.

- HI.- HI.

announcer: IT WAS UNANIMOUS.

ANYONE WHO WORKED UNDER HEATHERCOULDN'T STAND HER.

- OH, MY GOD.

announcer: SHE LORDEDOVER HER UNDERLINGS

LIKE THE WICKED WITCHOF THE WEST

AND FED OFF THEIRINTENSE HATRED.

- OH, DON'T MAKE THATSAD FACE.

[elevator bell rings]

announcer: NOW BACKTO THE ELEVATOR.

- OH, MY GOD.OKAY, ALL RIGHT.

WHAT WAS THAT?WAS THAT NORMAL?

announcer: HER EMPLOYEES WERESURPRISED TO SEE

THE ALWAYS CONFIDENT UBER-BITCHFREAKING OUT.

- I NEED TO GET OUTOF HERE NOW.

announcer: IF SHE WANTED OUT,THEY WERE MORE THAN HAPPY

TO GET RID OF HER.

- COME ON!CAN SOMEONE OPEN THIS?

I NEED TO GET OUT.

- [grunts]PUSH.

- IN THE CASE OF AN ELEVATORBEING STUCK BETWEEN FLOORS,

I WOULD SAY THE WORST THINGTHAT YOU COULD DO

IS ACTUALLY TRY TO GET OUTOF THAT ELEVATOR.

announcer: THEN ANOTHERPASSENGER CAME ON BOARD

THE ELEVATOR SIGHT UNSEEN.

HIS NAME?

LET'S CALL HIM FATE.

- [screams]

announcer: THE HYDRAULIC BRAKESON THE ELEVATOR CAR RELEASED

THE EMERGENCY BACKUP BRAKESKICKED IN,

BUT NOT BEFORE HEATHERWAS CRUSHED.

ON HER WAY UP, HEATHER STEPPEDON EVERYONE'S BACKS.

THAT'S WHY NO TEARS WERE SHEDWHEN SHE BROKE HER OWN.

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