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Posted November 04, 2008 | 14 comments

UFC

The Top 5 TUFers to Beat Kimbo Slice

We recently reported that Dana White had extended a public invitation for Kimbo Slice to compete on The Ultimate Fighter. He then prompted his invitation by letting everyone know that Slice had no chance of actually winning the contest, so we figured we'd highlight five former TUF winners and explain why they would beat Kimbo in a fight.

Michael Bisping

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Kimbo stands virtually no chance against a guy whose game revolves around something the dude has never heard of: combinations. Slice's street fighting ways of standing toe-to-toe and throwing bombs until someone dies, simply won't fly against a guy like Bisping.

If Slice was able to land a solid blow to the chin, he might have a shot at knocking out Bisping but there's no way he'd even be able to find the Brit, let alone hit him. Bisping's footwork is almost unparalleled in the UFC. He would literally dance circles around the bigger man and probably be able to implement a fairly effective game of peek-a-boo. Bisping most likely wouldn't land the knockout punch, but he would score shot-after-unanswered shot and secure a unanimous decision.

Matt Serra

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If Serra's New Yowk accent didn't cause Kimbo to hang himself over the side of the cage, the post-fight embarrassment of getting subbed by a guy who's barely tall enough to ride the Pirate Ship at the carnival certainly would. Either way, this would go down in Serra's book as one of the easiest wins of his professional career. A few years ago, he picked up his Black Belt under someone you may have heard of named Renzo Gracie. And that's no joke.

Gracie Jiu Jitsu was originally designed by Grandpa Gracie a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away. He was a tiny old man and the bullies in Brazil were always steeling his lunch money, so he developed this new brand of jiu jitsu that was designed for a small man (like grandpa or Serra) to beat up bigger guys (like Brazilian bullies or internet fighters). Ok, so maybe that story was a little dramatized but, the last part was true, which means Matt Serra specializes in beating up bigger guys. 

He'd come out in a low stance and just wait for the behemoth to throw a lunging punch, then he'd shoot in for the legs and it's lights out. Slice would be sleeping and Jared Shaw would steal his gold teeth before he realized what happened.

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