The Top 10 Games to Play While Loaded
I’ll be honest. I might’ve gone to a five-hour champagne brunch directly before coming into work to write this today. So, at this point, every single game on this list sounds effing incredible – as effing incredible as, like, waffles. Oh man. Waffles, with ice cream and butter. Right after this list, I’m totally getting some buttery waffles à la mode.
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By Reverend Danger
The following article does not represent the opinions of Spike TV or its affiliates.
10. SSX Tricky On Tour - PS2
Mitch Koobski, the guitar-playing unicorn, and the biped known as Bigfoot are just two of the bonus characters in this button-mashing, xxxtreme with three x's, skiing and snowboarding game. It’s pretty hard to crash, and when you do, it’s not that big of a deal. With very little time spent, you can unlock the entire mountain for free riding, and as a bonus, the soundtrack kicks ass.
9. Super Smash Bros. - N64
Another good button-masher with a lot of violence and color that you don’t need to be totally there to enjoy. Link was the best, by the way. The chaos he caused with his backpack of bombs was unprecedented. I got so good that people used to call me Link in the dorm my freshman year. True (and awesome) story.
8. Virtua Fighter 5 - PS3, Xbox 360
The secret Dural corporation is staging the 5th World Fighting Tournament to effect world domination! Whatever, though, this made this list for three reasons: 1. Shun – master of drunken kung fu. 2 and 3. Sarah Bryant’s spandex-clad chest protectors.
7. The Guy Game - PS2, Xbox
This is a trivia game whose most brilliant feature is the Flash-O-Meter. It’s a meter that measures how much the in-game, unanimated, real girls flash you. Get more questions correct in the “TitWitz” portions of trivia and see more tit. Fact! And, the fun thing is, just like in real life, the more out of it you are, the less likely you are to be witty and see naked ladies.
6. Rock Band/Guitar Hero - PS2, PS3, Wii, Xbox 360
Music makes a lot of things better. So does getting 'faced. Combine the two with video games and you’ve got the music games phenomenon of the 21st century. Pick your poison: Rock Band (1 or 2) or any of the Guitar Hero games. Just don’t pick Wii Music. What a buzzkill.