St. Louis Cardinals Want More Steroids and Perjury in their Line-up

January 7, 2010

During one of the most exciting press conferences the state of Missouri has hosted in weeks, St. Louis Cardinals manager Tony La Russa told reporters that he would love to put Mark McGwire (who serves as the team’s hitting coach) on the team’s playoff roster later in the year.

McGwire, who just grabbed slightly more Hall of Fame votes than Steven Seagal earlier this week, has not played organized baseball in nearly a decade and recently celebrated his 46th birthday by prank calling Jose Canseco and sobbing gently into a participation ribbon that he received from his trip to Congress.

Still, La Russa feels the former home run king can make a difference. "If we're in contention, we'll put him on the roster August 31,” La Russa told reporters. "It's a nice little dream."

I like this approach. Keep him nice and rusty just before the playoffs. This is a can’t miss move!

Source: Michael Zagaris/MLB Photo Archives/Getty Images Sport/Getty Images