Mantenna - Wednesday, June 24

June 24, 2009

The Governor of South Carolina explains his bizarre disappearance, Burger King uses sex to sell its sandwiches, and a cause of death has finally been established for ex-Wilco member Jay's the Mantenna!

Source: Pascal Le Segretain/Getty Images

South Carolina Governor Admits AWOL Affair

The strange story of the disappearance of South Carolina’s Governor just got a lot stranger today. Mark Sanford went missing for seven days and today admitted travelling to Argentina to visit a woman with whom he was having an affair. The woman at the center of the affair is a “dear, dear friend” who the Governor has known for eight years. The affair started about a year ago and he’s seen her three times in that period. Sanford’s wife found out about the affair five months ago. He told a press conference, "I've let down a lot of people, that's the bottom line.” He also said he’s spent "the last five days” of his life “crying in Argentina." [Yahoo! News]

Burger King Uses Sex to Sell Phallic Sandwich

A racy Burger King print advertising campaign is raising controversy for its oral sex connotations. The ad for Burger King’s BK Super Seven Incher sandwich shows a woman, who cannily resembles a blow up doll, with her mouth open waiting to receive the lengthy sandwich in her mouth. The main text of the ad reads, “It’ll Blow Your Mind Away.” Anyone else hungry? Yeah, we didn't think so. [Gawker]

Hitman Part Deux

20th Century Fox liked Hitman so much they're making another. Screenwriter Kyle Ward (Kand and Lynch) is set to write the sequel and it’s presumed Timothy Olyphant will return as Agent 47. Adrian Askarieh, Chuck Gordon, and Daniel Alter are going to produce the film, which doesn’t yet have a release date. The movie is based on the popular video game franchise, which has a fifth sequel coming out in 2010. The original film from 2007 made a whole lot of money and helped Olga Kurylenko become a Bond girl. Will part two have as much bang for the buck as the first? []

Former Wilco Member's Death Ruled an OD
The Associated Press reports that the May 24th death of former Wilco member Jay Bennett has been ruled an overdose. According to Champaign, Illinois County Coroner Duane Northrup, Bennett died from an overdose of the pain killer Fentanyl. The AP reports, "the drug is found in patches commonly prescribed to treat chronic pain." Bennett's death is being investigated as an accident. [Billboard]

Meat Water?!



Sometimes a man needs meet, but he’s on the run...and that’s when he needs Meat Water. Meat Water is a great new drink that quenches your man-thirst, and it comes in all the flavors you’d want your Meat Water in: beef jerky, beef stroganoff, cheeseburger, chicken teriyaki, dirty hot dog, fish’n chips, and many more. It’s long been known that water is for wusses, but Meat Water really seals the deal. We can’t all pack a six-course meal in our lunches, but we can all take a manly slug of Meat Water. []

Are You Ready for a Microsoft Beer Keg?

Bill Gates is listed on a new patent for a "thermally sealed container." And yes, one of its potential functions is to hold beer. Apparently the new invention is not quite a keg or thermos, but a system that "may include more segments principally defining at least one storage region; and one or more regions of substantially thermally sealed connections between at least one of the one or more surface regions of the one or more segments wherein the one or more regions of substantially thermally sealed connections and the one or more segments form an integrally thermally sealed storage region." Whatever, as long as it keeps the beer cold. [TechFlash]

Nazi Role-Playing Sex Freak Max Mosley To Finally Step Aside As FIA President

Alleged total weirdo Max Mosley has agreed to step down as president of FIA, Formula One's world governing body, after elections later this year in order to unify the Formula One championship. You follow Nazi sex scandal news, you may remember that last year, Mosley was involved in a very well-documented one. We'll miss you, you little freak. [Times Online]

Check out previous installments of Mantenna:

Tuesday, June 23

Monday, June 22

Friday, June 19

Thursday, June 18

Wednesday, June 17

...or see the rest of the archive!