A Cure For Coulrophobia
#BroBlog is back after a hiatus of world traveling! I needed some time away to get over my fear of clowns, and I officially have! Dr. Fishman gave me a certificate and everything, so I'm ready to rock. Robbie E is no longer scared of clowns, bro! Well, I'm not as scared as I was anyway. You gotta admit, clowns are creepy, bro. Here are the top 5 reasons I hate clowns:
5 - Too Happy - They are always happy, bro. Even when they are sad, or scared, or mad, THEY STILL LOOK HAPPY! That is so creepy. No sir!
4 - None of Them Workout – All clowns are either really fat or really skinny. When was the last time you saw a clown in a gym? How can you live a life with no muscles, bro? FREAKS!
3 - Bad Fashion – Clowns dress so bad, bro. People that have no fashion sense are mind boggling to me, and every clown looks like he got dressed in the dark. Striped shirts? Big red noses? How can you look in the mirror at yourself, bro?
2 - Names - All clowns have weird names. Squeaky, Muffles, Michael, Jacks, Little Man... the list goes on and on! How about a REGULAR name? Like Robbie E, or DJ Z, or Mr. PEC-tacular?
1 – "Pee Wee's Big Adventure" – The scene in the movie where the clowns steal Pee Wee's bike has freaked me out since I was 4, bro. I HATE THAT MOVIE!!!!!!!!!!
Until next time… BOOM! NO MORE CLOWNS, BRO!!!!
Image credit: TNA Entertainment