Fresh off a humiliating mid-career collapse with the Arizona Diamondbacks, regional embarrassment Eric Byrnes has hung up his major league cleats and begun a prosperous career in a California slow pitch league. (Guess who’s buying the post-game beers?)
The 34-year-old outfielder forcefully retired earlier this month after starting the 2010 campaign with a blistering .094 batting average and a series of Manny Ramirez-quality fielding errors.
Rather than work with Byrnes (or show any sort of faith in him), his current franchise – the Seattle Mariners - decided to pay him $11 million to stay home and stop ruining their team.
Luckily, the move freed up Byrnes to join a beer league squad with some of the West Coast’s most athletic teachers and bartenders.
His first game is later this week and Byrnes seems pretty excited about the possibilities. “I can’t wait for my first hit. I’m going to ask for the ball.”
(Honestly, I kind of love his attitude.)
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