Apparently NFL Stars Can't Drive Home Wasted With Teenage Girls Anymore

January 29, 2010

Maybe cryptkeeper look-a-like and noted Care Bears collector Al Davis has a point. The world is getting a little softer these days, and it’s starting to affect the NFL. I remember when football players could get as drunk as they wanted, drive dozens of teenage girls around town, and possibly even impregnate them with virtually no consequences (or as Lawrence Taylor calls it, "the good old days"). But in 2010, law enforcement and siolly women’s rights groups seem to “frown” upon this sort of thing.

Cincinnati Bengals star rookie Ray Maualuga, who sharpened his moral flexibility while studying under bribe-master Pete Carroll at USC, was arrested on suspicion of DUI this morning after being pulled over with two teenage girls (one of whom was underage) in his Pontiac Sunfire.

Seriously, a Pontiac Sunfire, Ray?

Maualuga’s arrest is especially disappointing for Bengals fans who now have to reset their “211 days without a crime committed” scoreboard back to zero this morning.

Source: Joe Robbins/Getty Images Sport/Getty Images