Russell Brand Hired a Team to Get Chicks

May 13, 2010

Funnyman Russell Brand was once so addicted to sex he hired a team of people to help him target and score women. Sounds like an awesome job.

In an in-depth interview in the June issue of Playboy magazine the British comedian comes clean about his battle with sex addiction and the lengths he would go to have a roll in the hay.  Brand was apparently so desperate to score that he literally “outsourced” picking up girls. He tells the mag, “When I was at my most promiscuous, I was like a charging locomotive. My selection process was outsourced. I had a team of experts who took care of finding women for me. They had very specific instructions. It was as if I was talking to a wine steward - 'I'm looking for something French, a bit fruity, smells of oak.'” The 34-year-old has since turned his life around, presumably fired his sex crack-team and settled down with his fiancé, singer Katy Perry.

A lot of guys may think the notion of sex addiction is silly. It’s like, really, a guy can have too much sex?? Brand says sex addiction is a very real problem and actually very unfulfilling. He tells Playboy. “I've reached a point in my life where I understand empirically that this is not the answer. When you sleep with loads of women, it becomes a bit pointless and futile.” If you’re not enjoying a good dose of horizontal mambo, then it’s safe to say you have a problem.

Brand, aware he was sleeping with way too many women and that it was becoming an issue (presumably because his belt now has way too many notches in it) decided to check himself into rehab for sex addiction. Brand says sex rehab is not at all glamorous and definitely not full of blonde porn stars who are literally begging for it. Instead, he says, “The majority of people in sex rehab are just disgusting men. There aren't hot blondes ripping off their clothes and saying, 'I'm gorgeous, and I just can't get enough!' It's just sleazy men pleasuring themselves in dark corners. Let's not shy away from it: they're pedophiles and perverts." Doesn’t sound like the sort of place you’d want to end up.

Photo: Jean Baptiste Lacroix/WireImage/Getty Images