Top 10 Ballsiest Non-Sports Cheaters
The sports world is constantly on fire with allegations of doping, cheats, whoring, and swindlers. It's almost to be expected at this point. But cheating isn't limited to athletes on the playing field.
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10. Stephen Glass
This self-proclaimed "Fabulist" reporter didn't just make up stories about churches that worship the first President Bush or software companies hiring teenage hackers to hack their site to the bone. He actually went out of his way to try and bring them to life by getting his friends and relatives to pose as sources, creating business cards for people who didn't exist and even building a fake company website. And when the holes in his stories were too big not to notice, he started using his loyalties in the magazine's offices against those who eventually destroyed him by playing on their neuroses and sympathies. It's like working with someone whose DNA is spliced with Bernie Madoff, Michael Scott, and Mr. T's soul patch with all the likability drained out of him.
9. The Steinmetz High School Academic Decathlon Team of 1995
Test cheaters have infiltrated every level of the educational system from the high school senior to the fingerpainting-eating kindergartner. One group of very ambitious pupils not only took the art of looking on the other guy's paper to a whole new level, but they have since remained defiantly unrepentant of their dastardly actions.
An academic decathlon team from Steinmetz High School in Chicago managed to cheat their way to the top of the testing leader boards after a student stole a copy of the test and the team memorized the answers. Even the teacher who moderated the team encouraged and coached their cheating ways all the way through the competition. They claim they were motivated to show how the educational system was stacked in favor of better funded and more affluent schools, which might explain why some of the students not only admitted that they cheated but were actually proud of their deeds. One of the students even said he would "do it again" if given the chance. And you thought the high school kids on Glee were overly melodramatic.
8. Henry Ford II
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Just because you're the son of one of the most famous (and scariest) men in American history doesn't mean you can skate by through life without getting knocked on your ass by the clothesline of mediocrity.
The son of the famed car magnet loved to throw his weight around more than Kirstie Alley on Dancing with the Stars, telling his subordinate executives that "my name is on the building" to keep them in their place. In his college days, however, not even his world famous name could get him out of trouble. He once turned in a ghostwritten thesis to an English professor at Yale as his own work, which impressed the professor until the receipt for the ghostwriter fell right in the professor's lap. He continued to deny that he got caught with his hand in the iron maiden-spiked cookie jar, claiming that his stupidity got him expelled. Apparently, it wasn't stupid enough to keep the school from naming a computer science fellowship after him.
7. Leona Helmsley
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You don't earn the title "Queen of Mean" for nothing. The puppy-strangling requirement alone could make Chuck Norris' moustache curl into the fetal position.
The late hotel heiress who looked like a mutation of Jack Nicholson's Joker and a large mouth bass was legendary for finding new and unique ways to weasel out of financial responsibilities to her employees, personal purchases, and even the federal government. However, the day she grew a big, creepy pair of fuzzy dice was when she reportedly proclaimed "We don't pay taxes. Only little people pay taxes," a sentiment that would eventually land her in the clink for tax evasion. And assuming there's a God in heaven, I'm sure her cellmate wasn't one of those people who paid her taxes either, if you know what I mean.
6. King Charles II
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Monarchy and mistresses go together like a peanut butter and marshmallow fluff sandwich. Once they get stuck together, not even steel tow cables and a pair of monster trucks can take them apart, but damned if it ain't fun to watch them try.
This 17th century King of the Britains had more than any man's fair share of the wench warehouse. He not only had more than one mistresses in his datebook at once, but he fathered 14 illegitimate children with them. And if that wasn't baller enough, he made no attempt to hide the fact that he got around. He actually prided himself on his flock of whores and bastards, and his mistresses spoke openly about their relationships. He made the old Hugh Hefner look like the really old Hugh Hefner.