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Mantenna – Stephen Colbert Wants to Replace Hank Williams Jr. on Monday Night Football

by dsussman   October 05, 2011 at 4:00PM  |  Views: 3,961
Stephen Colbert wants to replace Hank Williams Jr. on Monday Night Football, the NBA lockout looks to be long-term, and fussy college types continue to be amazed by guys who goof off in school…the Mantenna will never tap out!

Stephen Colbert Wants to Replace Hank Williams Jr. on Monday Night Football

Stephen Colbert Wants to Replace Hank Williams Jr. on Monday Night Football
Source: Comedy Central

As you all already know by now, Hank Williams Jr. was kicked off Monday Night Football for his recent rant comparing President Obama to Adolf Hitler. For those of you nervous about the position being filled properly, ideal candidate Stephen Colbert is here to the rescue. The amazing show host recently used his program The Colbert Report following the breaking news to vent on the matter while simultaneously suggesting the perfect man for the job. Colbert was mostly in shock that the classic “Are You Ready For Some Football?” music video was absent from the NFL telecast. “Not hearing that song left me dangerously unprepared for some football,” Colbert said to his audience. “I’m in my living room innocently watching a Chevy Silverado ad and suddenly a bunch of gigantic, angry men in shiny tights start hitting each other, hurling and kicking a weird, leather oblate spheroid. It was hours before I realized it was some football. And needless to say, I was not ready for it.” Thankfully, Colbert went ahead and auditioned for the part himself. Hit the Comedy Central site to check out the awesomeness. [Comedy Central]

Fussy College Types Continue to Be Amazed by Guys Who Goof Off In School

Ahhh, college. Four years of intellectual pursuits, beer pong, flag football, ultimate Frisbee...wait, why were we going here again? Oh, right, learning. But some college administrators would like guys to learn more. Essentially, the problem is guys overestimate themselves and their abilities, so they feel justified in goofing off and comfortable with lower grades, while women lowball themselves and tend to work themselves to death in college. In short, women need to start being arrogant like us and stop working so hard. See, college is fun when you stop taking the place you spend $20,000 a year to attend so seriously! [The Chronicle]

NBA Lockout Looks To Be Long-Term, Time To Start Caring About Hockey Again

NBA Lockout Looks To Be Long-Term, Time To Start Caring About Hockey Again
Photo: Patrick McDermott/Getty Images Sport

Well, the preseason is toast, and if the players and the owners don't reach an agreement by Monday, it looks like the first two weeks of the NBA season will be toast too. For those not following this labor dispute, basically, the players want slightly more than half, while the owners want them to eat a ten percent cut to under half. That's nothing doing, so, facing loss of games, which means loss of revenue for all sides...they broke up without setting a next meeting. Hey, there's still football and hockey! [ESPN]

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