Tiger Woods Shows Other Adulterers that Dreams Do Come True

December 16, 2009

What do a closet full of dark secrets and green jackets, 11 mistresses, 56 PGA Tour wins, and a $300 million “please don’t leave me” spousal bribe get these days?
According to the fine folks of the Associated Press, it adds up to the right to be called the “Athlete of the Year,” as evident by a recent vote that handed him one of the sporting world’s highest honors.

With the award, Tiger joins an elite club of accomplished adulterers like NBA MVP Kobe Bryant, NFL MVP Steve McNair, and MLB MVP Alex Rodriguez. (As a disclaimer, no actual scientific studies have been administered that unequivocally proves that sleeping around makes you better at sports.)

Woods was trailed in voting by Lance Armstrong, Michael Phelps, and Roger Federer – meaning that the Associated Press feels that a golfer, cyclist, swimmer and tennis player are the four greatest athletes in the country.

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