How To Handle The "Fake Fighter"

July 23, 2009

The survival of the so-called "fake fighter" is a phenomenon that has baffled scientists since the dawn of time, yet somehow he manages to wiggle his way into society and annoy the rest of us. Real fighter Kurt Pellegrino and MMA Girl Joanne have some direction on how to act when you come across one of these faux-maniacs.

A fake fighter, easily identifiable, is very simply someone who wants to be a fighter but doesn't have it between the legs to actually train and jump inside the cage. They'll wander around popular spots where women are known to be and one might expect to find an actual fighter (bars, gyms, etc.). Look for your fake fighter to have an unusually orange tan, sport his fight shorts in public, and of course, have perfectly symmetrical ears. They'll probably be drinking some kind of protein shake and will be obnoxiously recalling "this one time" when he was "training" and his buddy "totally f***ed up this other dude" in one of the "sickest submissions ever." Of course, none of this is true. He's describing a scene out of a Bruce Lee movie. In the most extreme cases, he'll actually butt his way into your conversation and volunteer information about his blossoming fight career.

As a quick reference, you can pretty much assume anyone on this site claiming to be a fighter is a phony.

It should be noted that these charlatans are not limited to MMA. You'll find this type of imitator following pretty much any sport. Or anything that might help you score some tail, really. If you're ever unfortunate enough to bump into one of these pseudo studs, Kurt Pellegrino can be seen as a model of how to act.

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Kurt will actually be fighting Josh Neer on August 8th at UFC 101 in Philadelphia.

Source: MMA Girls

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