Friendly Canadian Folks Still Having Nightmares About Fergie

September 28, 2010

Several months ago, various media outlets reported that the Black Eyed Peas would perform at this year’s Super Bowl. The announcement prompted Canadian Football League fans to shudder, as Fergie and company’s performance during the 2005 Grey Cup is apparently regarded as the Great White North’s half-time show Vietnam and a source of mental anguish for an otherwise calm, mentally stable group of people.

The Canadian media (which is comprised of six daily newspapers and an AM radio station) claimed that Fergie’s suggestive bootie shaking and revealing outfit sullied the proud nature of the CFL.

Here’s what one rational reporter wrote while suffering half-time show flashbacks:

Until the Grey Cup halftime show I was proud to be a Canadian. Now I’m not. I’m ashamed, embarrassed and angry. There were young children watching that disgusting bump and grind and I can only imagine the horror with which the parents of those children witnessed that so-called musical display.

Are you happy, Fergie? You made him ashamed to be Canadian!

With dozens of surly syrup enthusiasts still suffering emotional distress from the performance, it’s possible that the NFL may have to reconsider their selection in musical entertainment. (They won’t, because nobody cares what Canadians – myself included – think, but it’s something to consider.)

Ever since Janet Jackson flashed some flesh in 2004, the NFL has done a pretty good job of making sure that nothing interesting happens during the half-time show. Are they prepared to curb their six-year streak of melodic boredom? Seems like they’re willing to take the risk.

Photo: Gustavo Caballero/Getty Images Entertainment/Getty Images