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The Top 10 Signs Your Girlfriend's a Tramp

by girls   January 27, 2009 at 10:00AM  |  Views: 132,778

You’ve met the woman of your dreams. The two of you click in every sense. You spend all your spare time together and you’ve had the official boyfriend/girlfriend chat. The relationship couldn’t be more perfect, except for one nagging feeling - you suspect she's a slut.

Source: Warrick Page / Getty Images Entertainment / Getty Images

By Nick Coles

The following article does not represent the opinions of Spike TV or its affiliates.


10. She's Always Going to the Gym, Never Losing Weight


Source: Jamie Grill / Iconica / Getty Images

Going to the gym is the perfect alibi for skanky behavior. It gives your girl an excuse to be out of the house, to carry a change of clothes and get hot and sweaty. Also, she is less likely to raise suspicion when she returns home freshly showered. Guys don’t question this type of behavior because they like the idea that their woman is getting fit and staying in shape. But you should. If your girlfriend is going to the gym 7 times or more a week, then that’s a red flag. No one likes to work out that much, plus the body needs time to rest.

If your girl is working out everyday, then the pounds should be melting away. You should notice a difference in her weight. If you don’t, then there’s a problem. She either hording chocolate bars in secret or she’s whoring herself.

If you are still suspicious, take a look in her sports bag. The bag should contain sweaty, unsexy sports bras and track pants. If it contains lacy lingerie and chocolate body paint, then your girl is doing a different type of exercise.

9. She Works 'Nights'


Source: Steve Read / Stone / Getty Images

If your girl works at night and is vague about what she does or won't let you visit or call her – then she’s probably up to something. If she returns home in the middle of the night and smells like fresh flowers, then she’s probably not working in a bar or restaurant. She's most likely working the street, or some other dude.

Don’t think it doesn’t happen. In an article on hipster hookers, by Radar Magazine, one prostitute confessed that she has long term boyfriend who thinks she’s an event planner and is clueless that she’s a professional tramp. She admits "I feel guilty sometimes when I come home and he's asleep and I'm still wired from my night, but I always climb into bed next to him and try to fall asleep. When he wakes up he likes to touch me and make love, and that's when it hits me." So if your girl works at night, plan on visiting her, or better yet, surprise her.

8. She Smokes


Source: Lena Clara / fStop / Getty Images

There’s an old saying about girls who smoke – “if she smokes, she pokes.”  It is common knowledge among men that women who smoke are easier. As the Urban Dictionary nicely puts it “If a girl smokes a pack of cigarettes, that means she's simulating the act of sucking 20 little white dicks every day!”

Science also proves that women who smoke are sluttier. A study by the Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) found that those females who were current smokers or former smokers were “significantly more likely to have engaged in sexual intercourse than youth who had never used cigarettes.” So if you GF’s smoking a pack of Pall Malls a day, chances are she’s gotten around.

7. She Won’t Reveal Her Number of Partners


Source: Steve Smith / Photographer's Choice / Getty Images

As some point in a relationship you will have that intimate talk where you admit the number of past sexual partners. Girls usually start these types of conversations, because they love to know everything. If you initiate this conversation with your girlfriend, be prepared to be shocked.

Trampy girls go out of their way not to answer this question. They will use every trick in the book to get out of this awkward situation. They will change the subject, bribe you with sexual favors or ask you to answer first so she can answer with a number that's less that yours. This is a big warning sign.

According to a nationwide study by the CDC, the median number of male sexual partners for American women is 4. Only 9 percent of women aged 20 to 59 report sleeping with more than 15 dudes.  So, according to these statistics, if your lady’s number is over 15 she’s officially a member of the exclusive ho club.

Now, these surveys are generally useless, as we all now both sexes lie. Men exaggerate their number by doubling it and women halve theirs. Keep this in mind when you’re having that conversation.

6. She has a Tramp Stamp


Source: Simon Battensby / Photographer's Choice / Getty Images

Tramp stamps are a way for women to advertise their skankiness. These tattoos, located on the lower back, were first seen on exotic dancers, but are now more common on women everywhere.

A study by the Department of Psychology, University College London, London, showed that “tattooed women were rated as less physically attractive, more sexually promiscuous and heavier drinkers than un-tattooed women.” Dudes know that when they see a tramp stamp, it’s on.

The more angels, butterflies, hearts, dolphins, fairies unicorns or flowers the tramp stamp contains, the higher the odds she’s a slut. If it contains all of the above, then you’re in trouble.