The Top 5 Reasons Obama is Every Dude's President

November 5, 2008

We’ve got a new President.  It's pretty awesome.  Progress and change are on their way, but there are other things to consider.  Things like, "If Barack Obama and French President Nikolas Sarkozy were to indian leg wrestle, he would totally win."  These are the issues.  Hit the jump for the 5 most important reasons that Barack Obama is every dude's President.

5. Basketball Court in the White House


Obama has joked about removing the famous White House bowling alley and possibly replacing it with a court, thus facilitating a little roundball ruckus.  Please, oh please, let them call it the Supreme Court.  The average standing vertical of an American male is 22 inches.  That means, to dunk on an NBA regulation height basket a player (or President) would have to be at least 6’2’’ – which is exactly B.O.’s height.  Hillary might’ve broken a glass ceiling, but how rad will it be when Obama shatters the glass backboard of prejudice?

4. Foxy First Lady


Not since Jackie O. has the first lady of the U.S. of A. been so completely and utterly boneable.  Fist bump to you, Barack, my man!  She will be a welcome boon to the national masturbatorial debt when she immediately fills the nation’s males’ spank banks to overflowing. 

3. Middle Finger becomes International Political Tool

Obama doesn’t *$%& around.  Like, at all.  In an early speech during the primaries, he eschewed any kind political gesturing and side-stepping opting, instead, for the time-tested communication of flipping the bird.  Check this video out. Dude totally knows what he’s doing as per his impish grin.


2. National Conversations about Comics

Obama knows enough about the mysterious man from Krypton that he was able to banter accurately about his and the blue crusader’s origin stories.  Could a Secretary of Inking be far behind? Yes, it could, but certainly not as far behind as it used to be.


1. Obama Rocks 


In a Rolling Stone interview, Obama revealed his iPod playlist.  It was sort of all over the place but a few notable inclusions are the Rolling Stones, Bob Dylan, Earth Wind and Fire, and Jay-Z.  Perhaps his most notable music cred, though, is illustrated below:

The candidate said he thought rap music was also helping to break down barriers within the music world. Indeed it was reported last month that Obama will make a cameo performance on the rap singer Q-Tip's next album.

This President, indeed, is just a little too awesome.