The Eight Upsides to an NFL Lockout

by DannyGallagher   July 25, 2011 at 9:00PM  |  Views: 5,414

4. One less Super Bowl halftime show debacle

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The Super Bowl might be the biggest entertainment event of the year, but for me, the game is enough of a show. If I want a needless, pop culture-infused song and dance wedged in between dangerous athletic competitions, then I'll watch the Winter Olympics.

So not having a Super Bowl to watch would suck, but not having to sit through another halftime show would make it suck a lot less. Sure, occasionally the NFL gets it right by getting someone like Sir Paul McCartney, Prince, or the Rolling Stones. Most of the time they either pick the biggest flavor of the month of that year or they try to be edgy and hip and just end up giving old people one more excuse to flood the FCC's mailbox.

3. You eat too many chips and chicken wings the rest of the year anyway

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Most football fans might consider snacks like cheese-covered Cheetos and bacon-covered chicken wings to be once-a-year snack foods, but the rest of that stuff you eat before, during, and after the season ain't that much healthier, and no amount of denial can change it. Eating a hot dog that isn't deep fried isn't a "lite hot dog."

A recent survey of supermarket shoppers found that a majority of football fans "never" feel guilty when they snack out during the big game, including 60 percent of men and 46 percent of women. So for the time being, not having weekend get-togethers for the big game means you can give your poor circulatory system a break by not having an excuse to shove every square inch of it with bad cholesterol.

2. No meaningless preseason games

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Football is only fun when it counts. Preseason games are just an excuse to make a quick buck before a season that's going to make plenty more bucks by risking the health and status of a team before the season has even begun. Preseason games are that weird backwoods relative in your family who will eat anything for a quarter.

One less season would also mean not having to sit and worry about losing your star player to a couple of games that will have no bearing on the rest of the season. That will not only cut down on injuries on the field, but it will also cut down on injuries off the field, mainly the fans who chew their fingernails down to the bone marrow for fear that their number one draft pick will spend the rest of the season in a neck halo and intensive spine rehab.

1. Gives us more time to be mad about the NBA lockout

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So if the NFL had to take a knee for an entire year, I would've been fine with that. Sure I could've gotten mad and screamed and yelled and ranted and raved, but what good would that have done?

Besides, it would more productive to direct all that anger at the NBA who barely gave the fans time to contemplate what one less season of basketball would be like since they've already locked out the players, some of whom are contemplating joining overseas leagues next year. Can a sports league be charged with treason against its country?

THE DAILY FOUR

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