When a boy grows weary of this world, his mind wanders. Sometimes it wanders to Little Big Planet. More often it wanders to Lara Croft’s mansion. There are a lot of virtual worlds I wouldn’t mind kicking it in for a while. Hit the jump to see my top 10.
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10. Leisure Suit Larry
Source: Sierra Entertainment
Although not a stellar game, the character Leisure Suit Larry (henceforth LSL) had it pretty good. If my day-to-day is chasing tail in a world of digital sexiness, things could be worse. The reason this one didn’t rank higher is the same reason GTA did: rocket launchers. As the cheerleaders from my high school learned summer after graduation, a nice rack will only get you so far.
9. Prince of Persia
This would be a good one to live in because in the most recent iteration, you can’t really die. You just keep getting saved by a super hot girl. Haven’t you ever wanted to run up sideways onto a wall over a pit of fiery daggers without having to worry if a sexy lady will catch you if you fall? I do. Sometimes I want to do that twice a day!
Katamari would be a fun world to live in for its simple and ridiculous nature. There’s not a lot of clutter in your day mucking up your fun. Ironically, there is actual clutter everywhere, but all you have to do is roll the clutter up. You get to see all sorts of weird things, stick them together, and then talk to a space king about it. Usually you have to swallow that kind of entertainment in Amsterdam on a tablet.
7. World of Warcraft
The WoW is something a lot of people live in anyway. And, while it might not be the ideal world for some, I felt like it would be a sin of omission to not include it. It would have some delightful perks. I can’t ride giant bats here, and obviously that would rock my balls off. Also, you might get to meet Mr. T.
6. Shadow of the Colossus
Shadow of the Colossus is kind of a wild card pick, granted. But I enjoy battling epic things, and there’s few things more epic than a colossus. And, in this world, that is all there is to do! What’re you gonna do today? I don’t know. Maybe get up and have some toast and then fight a 500-foot tall man made of fire and stone. Friends is on later, too.
5. Grand Theft Auto
Source: Rockstar Games
Really, Liberty City offers so many exciting activities that I can’t think of a particular person that wouldn’t be pleased. Nymphomaniacal? Maybe you should be a prostitute. Of course, there is always the risk of being killed for your money. Better, perhaps, to be a carjacker. Then you still get the sex, but you’re the one making off with the money. Also: rocket launchers!
4. Little Big Planet
There is something pleasing about the cute little Voodoo dolls in Little Big Planet. This world also has the benefit of one being able to dress one’s self in an ironic and/or mischievous way. So I could bring that with me from real life. Also, maybe I could make it with a hot little sack person.
3. Banjo Kazooie: Nuts and Bolts
Banjo Kazooie appeals to both my cartoonish jocularity and my inner man-mechanic. Of course I want to build something, but can I make it have spirally, hypnotizing wheels and a fog horn? If you ask the Department of Motor Vehicles, they will tell you that you cannot. If you ask Banjo (or Kazooie), they will happily grant permission...and even lend a paw. Adorable!
2. Mario 64
There’s a lot about living inside Mario 64 to love. For the first time in all the Mario worlds, you can walk or run depending on how you’re feeling. You can also participate in cartoony wackiness like shooting yourself out of a canon or jumping through a magic painting. There’s always something to do or fight or collect. It’s just shiny and engaging and fun – much like Princess Peach.
1. Sega Marine Fishing
This was a Dreamcast exclusive and stands (sits in a fighting chair?) today as my favorite game of all time. The point of the game is to relax in a tropical location and go fishing. That’s all. It’s the best of all possible worlds. You can even get pretty close to living this reality if you buy the reel controller. And, having been close enough to that virtual reality to almost feel the Caribbean sun, let me tell you, there’s no better virtual world than this one.
What virtual worlds do you wish you could live or play in for a while?