The Top 10 Women Who Need to Eat a Cheeseburger
5. Lindsay Lohan
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Lindsay Lohan is back to her skinny ways. The starlet, who has battled anorexia before, has recently been photographed looking like a pole. According to Page Six, Lohan is "surviving on candy and Red Bull" and is "completely stressed out" by her rocky relationship with gal pal Samantha Ronson. This prompted a response from her people, who said "Lindsay is aware that she's lost some weight due to stress, but we recently did a photo shoot and she ate two full meals." Wow, two meals! But can you really count salad or a steamed vegetable a meal?
4. Paris Hilton
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It amazing that people think Paris Hilton is hot. The celebutante has an androgynous body, small breasts and absolutely no shape or curves. Watching her sex-tape was like watching a stick insect get punished. Over recent months the heiress has dropped even more weight and is alarmingly thin. Maybe it’s time for Paris to wash her car again.
3. Kate Bosworth
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Kate Bosworth looks like a 12-year-old boy. The super skinny star of Superman Returns and 21 is the poster child for stick-thin women. As her fame has increased, her waistline has gone the opposite direction. It’s like she is trying to be the Ally McBeal of her generation. Bosworth says she’s always been thin and uses the tired old excuse that her "slender" look is related to stress. Yeah right. Someone needs to buy the girl a cheeseburger. STAT!
2. Katrina Bowden
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Katrina Bowden is best known from her role as Liz Lemon’s sexy assistant on 30 Rock. She is a beautiful up-and-coming actress who recently ranked No. 4 on our list of the hottest women on television. Maybe this went to her head, because she continues to shed the pounds...and it’s scary. She recently appeared at an awards show looking all skin and bones. Someone needs to shove a double cheesebuger down her throat, or she'll be blown away by a strong gust of wind.
1. Keira Knightley
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Keira Kinghtley is scarily thin. She’s like a walking skeleton. She is so thin that her breasts are inverted. Recently, producers of the Pirates of the Caribbean films had to photoshop in some breasts so that audiences didn't think she was a dude. Keira says she does not have an eating disorder, saying "I'm quite sure I don't have [anorexia]. ... I've got a lot of experience with anorexia—my grandmother and great-grandmother suffered from it, and I had a lot of friends at school who suffered from it ... I know it's not something to be taken lightly and I don't." She even went as far as suing a British newspaper, which implied she had an eating disorder. Methinks the lady doth protest too much. Now, do you think she'll want fries with that?