Canadian Border Patrol Becomes Newest Team to Humiliate the Baltimore Orioles

June 1, 2010

The worst team in Major League Baseball continued their impressive commitment to humiliation when they entered a one-game showdown with the crack security team of the Toronto International Airport. (Spoiler Alert: Unless you view being detained for 10 hours as a moral victory, this was a pretty one-sided affair.)

The Baltimore Orioles star centerfielder Adam Jones, got an all-expense-paid trip to a Canadian holding cell Friday morning because the folks guarding the Great White North border thought he might be a threat to their very pleasant way of life.

“Last 10 hours have been a blast...yaaaaay. time to sleep off the bull,” Jones tweeted shortly after his release.

According to the Spike.com Canadian legal correspondence team, any foreign citizen with a criminal record trying to enter the country can be detained or refused entry depending on the severity of the crime.

Jones, who has no criminal convictions, wasn’t sure why he was selected for the ol’ “Maple Leaf shakedown.”

Fortunately, his mother had both a theory and functioning Twitter account.

"OKAY, LET ME CLARIFY - THERE IS A STORY OF ADAM BEING DETAINED AT THE CANADIAN BORDER! TRUE! MY BABY HAPPENS TO HAVE THE SAME NAME AS ADAM “PACMAN” JONES AND IT WAS A MISTAKE!!!!! END OF STORY," she said via the inter-web.

It’s nice to see Pacman Jones no longer has to use prostitutes or failed secondary coverage to destroy other people's dreams.

Oh, and in case anyone was worried about this episode hurting the Orioles' 2010 season progress, rest easy. The team lost three straight games to the Toronto Blue Jays over the weekend and vowed to not let Jones’ trouble motivate them to shake tings up and start winning games.

Photo: David McNew/Getty Images News/Getty Images

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