The Top 10 Sexiest Aliens

October 20, 2008

Tonight's Scream Awards will honor some of the best people in sci-fi. But what about the creatures that aren't people, the non-humans? Won't someone think of the aliens? You're probably writing off aliens as weird creatures you want to ignore so you can look at some choice human flesh. Well, here's a newsflash: Earth women have nothing on these alien babes.

10. Marta, Orion Slave Girl (Star Trek)


The original sexy green woman. Captain Kirk may have made out with countless alien babes, but when someone talks about Kirk macking on the green women, they're talking about Yvonne Craig. Marta is a cute little slave girl with tight green skin who knows how to dance. The Federation probably doesn't approve of alien girls being kept as slaves, but it definitely has its advantages.

9. T'pol (Star Trek)


Sure, her character is in her 60s, but that's nothing for a Vulcan science officer. T'pol is still young in the scheme of things. And no, she doesn't look like Spock. Maybe the same ears. But Jolene Blalock stretches out the front of the Starfleet uniform a little more. And much more importantly, she looks very good out of uniform. As in, dropping it on the floor. If only her Vulcan logic would let her turn towards the camera.

8. Princess Leia Organa (Star Wars)


The classic. It's hard to make a list of sexy aliens and not include the original sexy sci-fi princess. Since she was born on Alderaan, that makes her an alien. But what makes Carrie Fisher so memorable in this role was that gold bikini. It reminds us that even a fat tub of lard can have a sexy girl in a bikini chained up for his pleasure, and that's important to keep that in mind.

7. Sally Solomon (3rd Rock from the Sun)


You know, some people have been berating Kristen Johnston for being too skinny these days. Well, back on 3rd Rock, she was large and in charge as Sally Solomon. An alien completely unused to her human female body, her ample size dominated every scene she was in. She towered over many of the other characters, but still needed to be taught about her new female body. Now that's a fun lesson to teach.

6. Mary, The 3-breasted Whore (Total Recall)


Sure, she was only a bit character. Barely any lines, not much screen time at all. We don't know much about Mary, and we don't really care. What we know is this: She had her shirt off, she had three breasts (NSFW), and she was willing to have sex with you for money. Honestly, does anything else matter? Lycia Naff is easy enough on the eyes, but without the third breast, it's unlikely that she'd have made the list. You have to admit though, when it comes to breasts, more is better.

5. Boomer/Sharon Valeri (Battlestar Galactica)


Sure, the Cylons are an evil alien race of robots that have rebelled against humanity and are trying to kill everyone on Battlestar Galactica. And among the most deadly are those who take on a human form and hide their true nature, blending in with the rest of humanity. But we can forgive Boomer for that, especially because she has enough clones to be the girlfriend of a few different guys at once. And a whole room full of Grace Parks? Well, let's just say we wouldn't mind a Cylon pile-on.

4. Leeloo (The Fifth Element)


Automatically assembled like a robot/alien ramen, Leeloo was the key to the ancient lock in The Fifth Element. She's everything you could want in an assembled woman: Wild red hair, incredibly flexible, wears an outfit that consists of a few thin white bandages, and doesn't talk much. If Milla Jovovich falls into your cab, you'd better believe that you're having yourself one lucky day.

3. Xev (Lexx)


So there's this girl named Zev, and she's formed into the perfect body and supposed to be made into a sex slave. But then she gets some lizard DNA accidentally mixed in, and breaks free. She's eventually killed, but reanimated as a new and even sexier version named Xev. And she may not be a slave, but you know she's still got all the skills. Xenia Seeberg as an even hotter, feistier sex slave than her previous incarnation? Yes, please.

2. Seven of Nine (Star Trek: Voyager)


What is it about half-mechanical women? We'd have included the chick from Terminator 3, but she was manufactured entirely on Earth, and thus can't really be considered an alien. Seven of Nine, however, was part of the evil Borg collective. Then she was rescued, reprogrammed, and brought on board the Voyager. And it's safe to say, nobody has ever looked as good in a Starfleet unitard as Jeri Ryan. Anyone who can make that look sexy clearly deserves to make this list.

1. Caprica Six (Battlestar Galactica)


What's more awesome than a sexy alien robot? Howabout a sexy alien robot that exists inside of your head? Did we mention she was a blonde bombshell with legs that go all the way up? Caprica Six is our favorite Cylon on Battlestar Galactica, not only because she's the flat-out hottest, but also because after disappearing, she still haunted the waking mind of Gaius Baltar in hallucinations. Maybe haunted is the wrong word: If we started seeing visions of Tricia Helfer in skimpy clothing flirting with us everywhere we looked, we wouldn't be disappointed. In fact, if there's a way to sign up for that, let us know.