Kim Kardashian Adds 7.5 Points per Game to Her Sex Life

December 9, 2010

After dating – and subsequently ruining the career of – Dallas Cowboys Wide Receiver Miles Austin, Kim Kardashian has moved on and romantically linked herself to a guy who struggled for playing time on the Toronto Raptors three years ago.

Kardashian recently told reporters at a network that allows chubby Midwestern women to live vicariously through her sex life that she is now getting hot and heavy with Kris Humphries.

In case you haven’t taken the time to watch the New Jersey Nets embarrass themselves this year (don’t worry, there’s still plenty of losing left), Humphries is a mildly talented power forward who currently ranks sixth in scoring on a team that sits dead last in the Eastern Conference.

With all due respect to Humphries, who is probably kind of a nice guy, this seems like a step backwards. To start off with Heisman Trophy Winner (not keeper) Reggie Bush, make a pit stop at Pro Bowl NFL star Miles Austin, and then end up with a role player on an irrelevant NBA team appears to be a downward spiral.

She’s two more breakups away from dating a volunteer high school bowling coach and/or Craig Conroy.

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