Top 10 Celebs You Wouldn't Believe Had Their Own Video Games
5. Bruce Willis
Photo: Christopher Polk/Getty Images Entertainment/Getty Images
This game sounds like just about every Bruce Willis movie you’ve ever seen or heard, but his video game is actually quite different. In the game version, you get to control him.
The PSOne game “Apocalypse” featured the world’s baldest and most beloved action movie actor kicking all sorts of robotic and demonized ass through the realm of some distant distopian future where robots rule the world and Hell is being opened up to take the world back for the damned. You, of course, play the wise-cracking chrome dome as he shoots his way through Hell and back and back again while uttering cool lines like “Suck on this,” “These guys need a little bit more lead in their diet” (which is ironic since all the weapons are laser based) and “Buddy, I’m gonna shoot you in the face!” It’s a wonder that he never became our nation’s Poet Laureate.
4. Steven Spielberg
Photo: Jason Merrit/Getty Images Entertainment/Getty Images
Hollywood’s most successful and prolific mainstream director has long had a fascination with games and the gaming industry. He is a self-obsessed fan of video games. He created his own game for the Nintendo Wii with the quirky “Boom Blox.” Even his first date with his current wife Kate Capshaw was centered around playing Steve’s Atari 2600.
The game you probably don’t remember is “Steven Spielberg’s Director’s Chair,” a PC CD-ROM title that put ordinary schmoes in the cushy folding chair of a major motion picture starring the likes of Quentin Tarantino and Jennifer Aniston. You probably don’t remember it because it was a horrible game and Spielberg has the awesome power to make you forget anything he wants like...uh, I can’t remember. Shoot, what the hell was that?
3. Shaquille O’Neal
Photo: Fotos InternationalGetty Images Entertainment/Getty Images
It’s hard to know how this early SNES and Sega Genesis fighting game ever saw the light of day, but it probably involved the NBA star stepping on a few toes and possibly some legs, arms and entire bodies that were still in the standing position when they can smushed.
The early 90’s saw the birth of “Shaq-Fu,” one of the most incomprehensible and unplayable video games in the history of the medium. It featured the tall one wandering into some kind of distant dimension where everyone wants to kick his ass (so he landed in Orlando?). Apparently, he’s fighting his way through an angry voodoo priestess who knows kung-fu and an angry demon who knows kung-fu to rescue a small boy from the clutches of an angry mummy who knows kung-fu. The game would have been 10 times shorter and easier if they just sent Michael Jackson in his sted.
Photo: Jason Jones/Getty Images Entertainment/Getty Images
Games that featured live video seemed like a heaven-sent technology that could usher in a new age of digital entertainment, but when you have to spend it with the likes of the 80s answer to Dane Cook (and the reason for the question I’ve been asked most often since high school and no, I’m not f*#&$ing related to him), it’s more likely it came from Hell.
“Gallagher’s Gallery,” an arcade only title from the people who brought us “Mad Dog McCree,” aimed to inject humor into video games, something that seemed nearly impossible to do since the attention has always been focused on game play. That mission failed when they hired the food smashing comic to star in the light gun game that let players shoot and blow up everything from yucky cans of spinach to whole watermelons. They should have just called it “Why Third World Countries Hate America: The Game.”
1. New Kids on the Block
Photo: Shirlaine Forrest/ Getty Images Entertainment/Getty Images
Chances are you’ve never heard of or even seen this game before and you can either thank your lucky stars or immediately start seeking therapy because you’re cursing the makers of it for not sharing it with the public.
The birth of the boy band movement actually had their own video game in development with Parker Brothers but the game never made it past the testing stage, presumably either because all the testers went on strike en masse over troubling work conditons or killed themselves before they had a chance to fill out the comment card. A prototype of the unreleased game went up on EBay and reached a bidding high of $500...just for the game’s box. I’m sure it’s making some lucky sweaty, overweight and really sexually confused man very, very happy.
The Seven Sexiest Women Who Married Mediocre NHL Players
The 10 Most Annoying People You Meet in Online Gaming
Seven Celebrities With Surprising Gambling Problems