Russian Smugglers Build Vodka Pipeline

March 5, 2009

A group of 11 super manly men have decided the best way to get a f***-ton of vodka across the Russian/Estonian boarder was to build a gigantic pipeline for it.  It works for oil, right? 

They decided to do this because vodka is a lot cheaper in Russian, so smuggling it into Estonia means they don’t pay taxes on it and can sell it for a lot more. 

The guys sank a pipeline into a reservoir and ended up pumping 6,200 litres of vodka that was of such horrible quality they couldn’t find any buyers in Estonia.  They had it stored in a truck which officials finally found, foiling their brilliant plan to take that money back to Russia and buy a ton more vodka.

Because, man, if you had to live in Russia, you’d want to get knackered every second of every day, too.  A booze pipeline would scarcely stem the crushing weight of your sorrow. Don’t believe me?  Here’s what the Telegraph says:

Hundreds of Russians die each year from drinking ultra-strong homemade vodka, and many who live in the country's poorer regions resort to drinking shoe polish and cologne in an attempt to get drunk. 

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