It's All Fun and Games Until Someone Gets a Weiner in the Eye

February 23, 2010

Mascots do the darndest things! Just ask the folks in Kansas City, where Royals mascot "Slugger the Lion" is being sued for hurling a hot dog directly into the face of a man who has since suffered severe vision impairment.

According to a recently filed lawsuit, during a 2009 Royals game, Slugger the Lion was doing his standard “shooting hot dogs from an air gun” routine when things took a shocking turn for the worse.

Apparently the rogue mascot decided to put down the hydraulic weapon and begin throwing the steaming wieners by hand. Obviously a poor decision, because everyone knows that air guns are the safest way to project steaming tube steaks.

One of the hand-tossed hot dogs hit a fan in the eye leaving him with a detached retina and the development of cataracts. (Oops!)

The law suit is currently for $25,000 worth of vision-related damages and is exactly one-half of the amount a Chicago woman is suing Chuck E. Cheese for after getting hit in the head with an air hockey puck. Don’t you just love the American legal system?

Several thoughts on this;

1. If you’re trying to attract fans to come watch a team that is usually eliminated from playoff contention by the middle of April, shouldn’t you avoid assaulting them with lunch meats?

2. I would love to see video of a hot dog being shot from an air gun.

3. The fact that “Slugger the Lion” is listed as one of the defendants in this lawsuit is sort of awesome.

4. There’s probably a Jeter-A-Rod wiener eye-poking joke that I’m missing.

5. Mr. Lion appears to be on steroids.

6. Seriously, can we get some video on what this air gun hot dog toss looks like?

Photo: Dave Kaup/Getty Images Sport/Getty Images