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The Top Seven Worst Bands That Hipsters Love

by dsussman   April 25, 2009 at 10:00AM  |  Views: 56,543

Hipsters seem to love getting to things before everybody else just so they can say that they were ahead of the game. They never want to admit that they haven’t heard of a random thrift store, a particular piece of art, or some random indie film. Music has always been the worst though. I feel bad for artists that get placed on this unbelievably high pedestal by neon flannel-wearing douchebags, but I refuse to let these fools get away with this crap.

7. Clap Your Hands Say Yeah


Source: Gary Miller/Getty Images

If it was the ‘80s this band would have been filed under the one-hit wonder category. The reason why I say this is because they really only have one decent song and were very overblown in terms of talent, sound, and songwriting ability. I am, of course, talking about the song "Upon This Tidal Wave of Young Blood" by the way.

If you can actually get through an entire CYHSY record without stabbing yourself in the ears with a rusty screwdriver due to the lead singer’s skin-curdling vocals, you are a better man than I. I’m all for David Byrne-like vocals, but this dude Alec Ounsworth just ain’t cuttin’ it. The band recently performed on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon and it was awful. The vocals were a joke and the song was average, at best.

6. Peter Bjorn and John


Source: Tim Mosenfelder/Getty Images

If you're going to jump down my throat over this pick, you really need to ask yourself one question: Is this band actually good? Come on, you know the answer is "no."

I just saw these Swedish dudes at SXSW as well as Coachella recently and it was pretty bland to say the least. Their songs in particular are so boring it makes me sleepy just writing about them.

I gotta say what everyone is thinking though: “Young Folks” is a really good song. This aside, the band really doesn’t have anything else to fall back in terms of other solid material. There are a couple halfway decent tracks on their critically-acclaimed Writer's Block LP, but they are totally forgettable and not as mind-blowing as hipster die-hards have made them out to be. “Young Folks” is a perfect karaoke song and nothing more.

5. Times New Viking


Source: Gary Wolstenholme/Getty Images

When I bought this record a while back I thought I knew what I was getting into. I thought the LP would be filled will some skillfully crafted lo-fi/no-fi tunes straight outta the city of Columbus, Ohio. What I got was a record that was almost unlistenable. Literally. There is so much distortion on the record that it’s overdriven to the point of being incomprehensible.

I’m all for that My Bloody Valentine/No Age sound that they try to pull off, but all the songs off of Times’ Rip It Off LP are just a jumbled mess.

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