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The Top Eight Sci-Fi Disaster Scenarios You Can Survive

by John_Scrovak   March 22, 2010 at 10:00AM  |  Views: 1,595

Any fan of sci-fi can tell you there are dozens of ways the world will end.  Luckily for you, we've put together of the top eight most survivable scenarios, so you can live long.  And prosper.

Source: Lorenz and Avelar/Workbook Stock/Getty Images

By John Scrovak

 

8. Alien Invaders

Alien invaders are subversive and discreet because their entire mission depends on secrecy.  They come down to Earth and burrow into your mind to take over without anyone knowing just what's going on.  But there is a way to fight back.

As hard as they may try, these pesky sumbitches cannot seem to duplicate a personality or the knowledge a person has.  This makes it difficult to determine who's been infiltrated and turned.  They know everything your best friend knew, every last secret, and they'll try and use that information to get close to you.  If you notice the personality change, though, back away and go somewhere safe.  It may mess you up emotionally, but you can't be afraid to shoot your best friend dead, since there is no known way to remove these parasites without killing the host.  The best test you can perform to verify their presence in a person is an MRI or x-ray of the brain.  You will be able to see these little buggers as a lone dark spot on the brain, or lit up and wrapped around the spinal cord.

You may want to try and figure out their plans, but don't go listening through every radio frequency with that old radio in your garage. They'll simply use our own communications technology and talk in code we can't pick up on. 

Your best bet for survival is to establish multiple bases, compounds, more specifically, and allow entry only to those confirmed human.  You may have to take your group of rebels to the nearest airport and steal a full body x-ray scanner to place at the main gate of the compound, so you can determine infiltration immediately.  Stockpile on guns, and limit your use of computers (which they undoubtedly know better than we do) to the Internet, and look for the small sites that pop up around Weekly World News articles because, chances are, one of them has it right.  Your best shot at victory, as shown by the majority of sci-fi TV shows and movies out there, is to capture one, and show it we have emotions and a right to live.  Show him the happy side of humanity, and turn him into an enemy turncoat.  Use him for intel gathering, and strike at any enemy bases you can.  Fear for humanity will be your rock.

 

7. Zombies

Source: James Bruntz/Flickr/Getty Images

Contrary to popular belief, you do not want to run within days of the first zombie outbreak.  It is recommended you keep a closet in your house full of enough food to last you two weeks, along with enough ammunition for any weapons you own.  The best weapons to have in this situation are shotguns and M4-style assault rifles.  Pistols are not recommended, as shotguns would be equally as effective at close range, and they're more brain-scattering.

Hold out in your abode with plywood and bricks or mattresses in your windows for one full week.  You don't want them hearing you plotting their extermination.  You should already have a map with the three largest stockpiles of weapons in closest proximity to your house, and a map of the nearest food retailer warehouses.  We don't mean Costco and Wal-Mart (everyone will think of that). Those places will be jam-packed with people which, if but one of them is infected, turns the place into a hotbox of death.  We're talking about distribution centers for groceries and major chain store hubs.  Wherever you live, chances are, you're close to at least one.

Set out in a pickup truck, not an SUV.  Pickup trucks allow for the welding and creating of pintle mount turrets in the cargo area, so any survivors can help suppress the walking dead with flying lead.  After you stock up on food and supplies, remember not to confront or steal from other survivors who don't want to join your party.  That's a dick move, and you could very well end their life with that sort of douchebaggery. 

If you want to survive, your only real option is to join or create a caravan, constantly on the move, stockpiling fuel, weapons, and food at every stop you can.  If you want to rebuild humanity, that's a different story all together, and you're going to need to obtain large quantities of generators, chain-link fencing, and building materials.  Take your caravan out to the Midwest, or anywhere flat, so you can see at least a half mile in all directions, and erect a fenced in colony, with enough fencing to contain farmland, so you can become self-sufficient and no longer rely on traders and caravan trips.

 

6. Alien Conquerors

Source: Andy Ryan/Stone/Getty Images

Here's the difference between alien invaders and conquerors: Invaders are all about subtlety and infiltration.  Alien conquerors, on the other hand, want to destroy your existence, steal your planet, and they don't give two damns about who knows it.  They'll come in here all War of the Worlds-style and start messing your s**t up.

The only way to conceivably fight back against a sure-to-be overwhelming force of aliens with advanced machines and weaponry is to dig yourself down into cells.  I'm not talking about micro-nuclear invaders.  I'm talking about resistance cells.  Cells should be no larger than 40 humans.  That allows for up to eight teams of five to act in tandem, all reporting to a single cell commander.  That cell commander would be conferencing with other cell commanders, or more likely receiving his orders from a higher-up via Morse code, since the conquerors would have most likely cut all our power and communications lines.

The best way to stock your cell is with high-powered rifles, high-capacity pistols, and explosives.  You don't want shotguns because if the aliens happen to be filled with that acid blood-goo, you'll probably kill half your team with a single shot at an alien.  Stockpile gasoline and generators to run your equipment and radios to stay in contact.  You should set up these cells in major cities in the basements of large buildings (so the buildings and their natural electromagnetic output help mask your presence) or in the countryside, in old tornado shelters, so it's harder to find.

Your best shot at victory is to capture one of them alive, and learn anything you can from them.  If you can't do that, can't communicate, kill the hater and focus on capturing an enemy ship.  As we all learned form Independence Day and a variety of other movies, they will never expect us to take their own ship back to them and nuke their ass.  Unless they read this article before they come...

 

5. Dinosaurs

Source: Chris Cheadle/All Canada Photos/Getty Images

Dinosaurs can smell fear.  It sounds like a cliché, but scientists will tell you they haven't discovered that part of a dinosaur's olfactory system yet.  Yet. 

So you're sitting at home and be it a nuclear blast, a meteor strike, a volcano, or "sciencing" gone wrong, but somehow, those loveable death-beasts started walking the earth again.  As I alluded earlier, the first thing you have to kill is your fear.  Of anything.  Primarily because a Tyrannosaurus rex cannot see you if you don't move.  So if you find yourself trapped in the presence of one of these mammoth creatures, don't move.  Don't even piss yourself, they'll smell it, and you're just marinating yourself for an extra tasty meal.  Don't be that meal.

To survive, you're going to need an off-road vehicle.  My preference would be an F250 with a lift kit, because you can take those bad boys anywhere, but a Jeep would be fine too.  Stock your vehicle with high powered rifles, and large caliber handguns, preferably a .45 or a .50 Desert Eagle.  The larger the caliber, the greater the chance of doing some serious damage.  Also, you may want some grenades, but those are harder to come by.  Bring spare clothes and ammonia.  You may be asking why ammonia, well here's the answer.  It's a foreign scent to them, and it doesn't smell like meat.  Plus it's strong enough to mask the scent of your meat.  Not that meat, you dirty-minded fool, your body flesh. 

You want this vehicle because you don't want to travel roads and cities, as they are high population areas, and magnets for flesh-hungry lizard-heathens.  You want to travel the plains and the back roads.  When you encounter the Tyrannosaurus, aim for the eyes, the mouth, and the neck, the most vital parts of the beast.  When you encounter a raptor in front of you, turn around and start firing like mad, because these sumbitches are smart.  They will distract and flank you, pouncing you from behind, utterly ravishing your body, and not in a good way.

Lastly, for shelter, find a concrete or cinderblock building with limited entry points.  Randall Munroe has the right idea:

 

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