The Top 10 Most Unlikely Movie Badasses
When we go to an action movie, we expect our hero to look like Captain America and kick ass like Batman. That's why you've got guys like Stallone, Willis, and, before he decided to head off to the fantasyland of politics, Ah-nold. However, sometimes you find badasses in unexpected shapes and sizes.
By Jeff Kelly
10. Mr. Miyagi (The Karate Kid)
Source: Columbia Pictures
There's a classic scene in The Karate Kid where Daniel is getting his ass kicked by the dreaded Cobra Kai. Okay, so there are about 12 scenes like that in the first 20 minutes of the movie. But we're talking about the scene where he's rescued by a karate master who kicks the ass of every single member of the Cobra Kai and is then somehow confused (by Daniel) for Spider-Man. Did we mention this version of Spider-Man is a short, chunky, elderly Japanese handyman who used to serve up malts and burgers to Richie Cunningham? Yeah, we can see the confusion there too, Daniel. The best way to tell them apart, though, for future reference? Spider-Man doesn't need chopsticks to catch flies.
9. Margie Gunderson (Fargo)
Source: PolyGram Filmed Entertainment
Okay, so on the one hand Margie Gunderson is a smart, savvy cop who clearly has a good head on her shoulders and knows her s***. On the other hand, she's about 14 months pregnant and constantly suffering from morning sickness, which doesn't really play into the whole "badass" thing. Still, all Margie Gunderson did was waddle around the great snowy wastelands of Minnesota and North Dakota solving a complex kidnapping and murder, singlehandedly taking down a psychotic Peter Storemare in the process. And take it from us, we've tried it and can attest to the fact that Peter Storemare is far more crafty and devious than you might think.
8. Dale Denton (Pineapple Express)
Source: Relativity Media
Before Seth Rogen was actually (and inexplicably) cast as a superhero in The Green Hornet, he played Dale Denton, a weed-smoking process server who dates a high school chick. A super hot high school chick, sure, but still. Creepy. Typically our action heroes don't come in the form of chunky, scruffy-looking potheads, but sure enough by the end of Pineapple Express, Dale Denton is wielding machine guns, going toe-to-toe with a drug kingpin, and somehow managing to carry James Franco to safety despite not wearing any pants. Sounds like someone's been stealing movie ideas from our dreams!
7. Elvis (Bubba Ho-Tep)
The first of two entries on this list who are old enough to collect social security, "Elvis" is an old man convinced he's the actual Elvis, still alive and well (well, maybe not well) in a nursing home that is unfortunately being terrorized by an ancient and evil mummy. As far as we know, that's the only kind of mummy, but we're not experts. In any event, Elvis takes it upon himself, with the help of an old black guy in a wheelchair who is convinced he's JFK, to take out this Bubba Ho-Tep and save the rest of the senior citizens from being devoured. Of course as soon as the mummy was defeated, the old people probably started complaining about how he never calls anymore.
6. Samwise Gamgee (Lord of the Rings)
Source: WingNut Films
When you picture an action hero, you probably don't picture a little three foot rotund dude with big hairy feet and a green thumb, right? But over the course of the Lord of the Rings trilogy, Frodo's loyal gardener turns into the most badass hobbit of them all, though we're still not sure what was up with that "Mr. Frodo" s***. Still, Sam works over goblins with frying pans, fights off giant spiders, and takes care of a tower full of orcs seemingly by yelling angrily at them. And then when Mr. Frodo decides to bitch out and give up, Sam goes ahead and carries his lazy ass up the side of Mount Doom. So remember, if you ever have a dark lord that needs an ass-kicking, you'd better have Sam Gamgee on your speed dial.