Shaquille O'Neal Wants to Save the Dunk Contest and Haiti with One Amazing Proposal

January 20, 2010

Call him fat, lazy, over the hill, and the reason I lost $100 betting against the Cavaliers this weekend. But every so often, when he’s not busy missing free throws and cheating on his wife, the Big Aristotle comes up with some pretty awesome ideas.

Perhaps the best of these came last night when O’Neal proposed a way to finally save the NBA Dunk Contest from this Jason Richardson-a-thon we’ve been forced to endure over the last decade.

“I will only allow 'Bron [LeBron James] to do the dunk contest if Vince Carter comes back out," O'Neal said. "If Kobe comes back out and if another big name comes back out. If we could get a big prize and have half of the money go to the people of Haiti and the other half to the winner.”

O’Neal then challenged the best dunkers in the world to heed his cause.

“Vince, we're calling you out. Kobe, we're calling you out. We're calling everybody out. If those guys step up in the dunk contest, then I will allow my client [James] to step up,” he exclaimed.

Though it doesn’t appear that this will work, as a basketball fan who still spends at least 17 minutes each day watching retro dunk contest reels, not only would I tune in to this amazing event, but I would even order it for $39.99 on pay-per-view.

For the love of elevation, can we please make this happen? I can’t sit through 22 Nate Robinson dunk attempts again and pretend I’m interested.

(On a side note, I would personally choose Dwight Howard to be the fourth participant in this contest assuming Michael Jordan and/or a time machine were unavailable. Thoughts?)

Source: Lisa Blumenfeld/Getty Images Sport/Getty Images