Jesse James Is A Dead Man-Figure 8 Race

July 1, 2009

Hey Jesse:

I just saw your show, it was okay, but not as exciting as the police chase, the Arctic ride and The Rocket Motorcycle.

Jesse, the big fat guy that pretend to hate you did not make the show legit, especially when y'all were buddy buddy at the end. And what was that practice with the browning machine gun. Wouldn't it been better if you used a simulator or just used the track to practice the race, Spike do have the cash Jesse.

For a tall white guy with a sissified gay voice; you are not half bad. But the show has to do better. I got some ideas.

Here are my top ten!

1 Go to that Air Force Base in Calif. and steal copper off those dead jet planes and let the Marines chase you.

2 Break into a crips hideout and steal all their drugs.

3. Get initiated by the Bloods and go through that one minute azz kicking.

4 Smuggle some illegal aliens into the US

5 Jump over the White House fence and see if you can make it to the other side and escape.

6 Drive your motorcycle across Haiti and lets see if you get your azz kicked

7 Punch Brock Lesner in the face and see if you can out run him!

8 Ask Michelle Obama for some cutty!

9 See how many hits you can snort with Michael Irvin and lets see who falls out first!

10 Take a shot at the Mexican police and see if you can make it back to the old US of A.

Jesse, I am not kidding these suggestions will make the show more interesting!

Your buddy,