The Eight Music Videos That Totally Missed the Point
Music videos are noted for being weird, offbeat, and artistic, all of which are code for "ridiculous." Then there are the music videos that nobody actually bothered listening to the song before putting out.
Source: Tim Mosenfelder/Getty Images Entertainment
By Dan Seitz
8. "Hold On" by Korn
Jonathan Davis, probably history's only fat emo metal kid, actually had a good reason to write a song about getting through deep emotional difficulty, for once. Namely, he had a rare blood disease that nearly put him in the ground, namely idiopathic thrombocytopenic purpura. Roughly translated: "idiopathic" means doctors have no idea what the hell that causes it, and "purpura" means you're going to be covered in inexplicable bruises.
That really calls for a comedic video set at a rodeo in a town calls "Ballsville" which has a close-up of a bull's nutsack within the first 15 seconds. That really properly reflects the pain and suffering that went into the song. Great choice.
7. "The Reason" by Hoobastank
Source: Chung Sung-Jun/Getty Images Entertainment/Getty Images
We all remember this crappy, inescapable love ballad. It's pretty much a song about some loser who has realized the only thing he has going for him is the love of a woman, which he's probably never experienced before. So he promises he'll be better, because she makes him better. The kind of woman who goes back to the abusive husband repeatedly melted when they heard this, and it polluted the airwaves for months, and is no doubt the theme of many a tearful reunion, followed by both parties remembering why they broke up.
The weird thing is that this video actually starts out making sense, although it still has nothing to do with the actual ballad. The head Hoob, whatshisname, runs over some woman and obviously doesn't feel good about it, which gives those treacly lyrics an admittedly interesting little spin. Then the rest of the band pulls off a heist. Seriously. That's the video. Admittedly, the heist is kind of awesome, but still, we kind of want more of the head Hoob feeling bad. That actually makes the song interesting.
6. "F**k You" by Lily Allen
Source: Christie Goodwin/Getty Images Entertainment/Getty Images
What we love about Lily Allen is how adorable yet utterly cynical, profane, and rude she is. It's like your little sister suddenly developed the personality and comic timing of George Carlin. And she's at her best with this jaunty little ditty telling a racist, ignorant jerk to never speak to her again. We use it to end bad job interviews at Spike.com.
This song, of course, naturally lends itself to Lily Allen being a screaming bitch to everybody around her. First off, the concept of this video, shot through Lily Allen's eyes as she treats the entire world like an iPad, is kind of ridiculous. Secondly, it kind of undercuts the punch of a song complaining about people acting like douchebags when your singer is walking around performing a literal version of the Kids in the Hall "I'm crushing your head!" bit. Seriously, the entire video consists of her mutilating random bystanders for no reason other than it looks neat.
Also, nobody that adorable would do that. We refuse to believe it.
5. "Coffee and TV" by Blur
Source: Dave Hogan/Getty Images Entertainment/Getty Images
Yep, they did something other than the "woohoo" song. In fact, this is actually a kind of a touching song about a guy who's absolutely sick of the world and wants to go away with his significant other and, well, drink coffee, watch TV, and not talk to anybody.
So, what kind of video do you make about a song about not going outside? One about a dancing milk carton going on a grand adventure to find one of the band members and reunite him with his family!
Granted, the video is full of imagery explaining just how miserable it is in London, which makes sense, since London isn't exactly full of Care Bears. Still, it's a video about going outside and making the best of a tough world. But we understand why Blur went with the video. That dancing milk carton is just too cute to resist.