NHL Star Helps Fight Obesity by Mocking Fat People

October 29, 2009

Sure, setting up a lawn chair outside of a local Big and Tall store in order to laugh at all the tubby people looking to buy elastic waistband pants in quiet shame is a great way to kill a Saturday afternoon – but contrary to popular belief, fat people do have feelings (seriously). Which is why an NHL star calling his old coach “the fattest f***ing pig I’ve ever seen” may have been a tad on the insensitive side, despite his good intentions of inspiring healthier life choices.

Source: Photographer's Choice/Getty Images

In some inconsequential book coming out about the NHL, Washington Capitals Head Coach Bruce Bordeau claims that during last year’s Stanley Cup playoffs Sean Avery called him “fatter than Ken f***ing Hitchcock,” seen here – presumably after a pie eating contest – and that “I was going to die because I was such a fat f***.” A little harsh, but probably said out of concern and in an effort to inspire some much needed weight loss.

This “tough love” motivational technique by Avery is popular with high school cheerleaders and one that might actually help Bordeaux fit into those size 48 pants he’s had his eye on and end up letting him find his penis in the shower for the first time since the late 1980s.

Well done, Sean. If only other professional athletes followed your example in America’s fight against obesity.