Sperm Banks: Nobody Wants Redheads

September 12, 2011

Sperm donation is a popular method for guys behind the financial eightball because, let's face it, it's something everybody does anyway. You might as well get paid for it. But, with the worldwide financial downturn, a lot of people have been resorting to beating the bishop for cash.

So much so that, apparently, they've had their fill of redheads.

Cryos, the largest sperm bank in the world, recently announced that redheads need not apply to knock one out in their premises. Why? The forces of the free market have decided that they are unwanted.

Essentially, Cryos' president admitted that they have way more redhead baby batter than they need. Cryos ships sperm to 65 countries worldwide, because apparently it's a valuable resource, and the only reliable market for the genetic material of the gingers is, shockingly, Ireland. We can't imagine why.

Apparently they have a whopping 70 liters of the stuff available, hopefully not all in the same canister, and they have a waiting list of 600 guys who want to get in on this action. Brown hair and brown eyes are popular right now, due to the huge base of customers in places like Greece. But come on, they could use some more redheads.

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