Do Not Protest the Banking Industry With a Gatling Gun That Shoots Fireworks

August 26, 2011

One of the things that makes this country great is our freedom to peaceably assemble and speak our minds. If we don't like something, we can come together as a people and speak about it publicly. But there are certain things that right doesn't cover. Like, say, spraying the Capitol with fireworks.

To Glenn Neff's credit, he wasn't trying to hurt anybody. He was going to do it at night, well away from any tourists, and had a noble goal. But he really should have thought about how the police might interpret a guy in a red Jeep with a turret and multiple metal tubes mounted to it.

Neff wanted to draw attention to his opinion about the banking industry, which is, in light of our foreclosure rate, a rather dim one. But instead he drew the attention of the local police, who arrested him and, much to the shock of pretty much nobody, found alcohol and “drug paraphernalia” in his car. Gee, no wonder he wasn't making such great decisions.

Neff, who surrendered quietly, is currently in jail awaiting arraignment. The police, meanwhile, stated that they “neutralized the devices at the scene.” We're going to assume that means they threw them in a big pile, tossed a match, and ran, because that's what we do every July 4th.

Photo: U.S. Navy/digital version by Science Faction/Science Faction/Getty Images