Gilbert Arenas May Not Have Enough Money to Buy More Guns

January 12, 2010

In what many unemployed philosophy majors and the drive-thru staff at a local Burger Barn are hoping will become a Supreme Court case for the right to bear arms, Washington Wizards star Gilbert Arenas is in jeopardy of losing $111 million dollars for bringing a few “possibly registered” weapons into the team’s locker room. (Which goes against everything this country was founded on.)

According to the brilliant sports minds at TMZ, a high-ranking official in the Wizards organization recently told Arenas (who is suspended indefinitely for using a gun to threaten one of his teammates over a gambling debt), that the team may use a “conduct unbecoming to the team” clause in his nine-figure contract to void their deal and release him into the NBA abyss.

This could be bad news for an already short-handed Wizards team that only had eight players show up to practice today. The rest of the roster was reportedly a little busy testifying against Arenas to local authorities and re-gifting Carmelo Anthony’s “Stop Snitchin” DVD that none of them were able to watch this Christmas.

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