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The Six Seatmates You Don't Want on an Airplane

by Theta1138   June 21, 2010 at 10:00AM  |  Views: 1,928

3.Stanley Sheffield

We can understand not liking your flight attendant.  To be fair, it's a rough job. You're on your feet, dealing with people all day, your pay stinks, and in short, it's not a job we'd take.  Still, some people just rub each other the wrong way.

Stanley Sheffield was obviously one of those people, since he thought his flight attendant was Satan.


Granted, Stan the Man was not the most stable of individuals, but there's nothing like a passenger getting paralyzed with divine energy and starting dousing you with water in order to save you to really ruin your in-flight movie.  Then again, since it was The Ten Commandments, maybe there wasn't much of a difference.

2. Dimwit with a Plush Crocodile

Source: DAJ/Getty Images

We understand having an emotional attachment to your stuffed animals.  Um, because our girlfriends love them.  Anyway, some people just really love stuffed animals, and want to bring them on the flight.  Which is fine, even if the thing is huge, because if there are extra seats on a flight, why not?  Even if it's a three-foot-long crocodile.  Even if it's sitting in an emergency exit row-wait, no, that we're not down with.

The idea of a huge bunch of fluff blocking the possible escape from fiery death would seem pretty obvious to anybody, but the woman who held up a flight for two hours throwing a hissy fit because her plush crocodile couldn't have a seat isn't one of them.

Yep.  Two hours.  They argued with this woman for two hours instead of just throwing her off the plane or sending her to the nearest preschool.  Us, we would've just taken off and then opened the emergency exit: problem solved.


1. Galina Rusova

Source: Galina-Rusanova.com

Far be it from us to assume any stereotypes of Russians to be remotely accurate.  We know some Russians, and none of them are raging drunks saying "Das vidanya." Disappointingly, none of them can turn their skin to steel or do a Fastball Special, either.  (Also, don't ask for a Fastball Special at the Bunny Ranch.)

But not every Russian is a credit to their country.  Out to prove every stereotype of Russians true, or maybe just to see if Meredith from The Office really could choke that stuff down, Galina Rusova drank all the hand sanitizer and promptly went insane, for fun, biting flight attendants, screaming, and generally raising hell all over the airport.

Which honestly makes hand sanitizer sound like a lot of fun.  Maybe we'll lay in a few cases for our party tomorrow. The stuff has to taste better than light beer.



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