3. Lindsay Lohan as The Sister
Source: 20th Century Fox
The troubled actress has been conspicuously absent from the big screen of late so it probably wasn’t a higher calling that led to her role in Machete. Rather it’s likely no one else was willing to give her a check and trust that she’d actually turn up to deliver her lines. While Lohan’s acting skills are less than impressive in the film, her scene as a gun-wielding sister of the cross in full habit is one of highlights of the film and a lovely nod to the nunsploitation films of the '70s.
2. Penelope Cruz as Rosa
Source: Sony Pictures Classics
Before Penelope Cruz crossed over into Hollywood films she played a fiery nun named Rosa in Pedro Almodóvar’s epically good epic All About My Mother. Rosa is no ordinary nun and it’s fair to say she had wandered somewhat off the straight and narrow path. While Rosa has the saintly job of working in a shelter for battered prostitutes, she's not so saintly when it comes to adhering to the vow of celibacy. In the film Rosa is pregnant and, as if that wasn't controversial enough, the father of her child is an AIDS-infected transvestite named Lola. Try explaining that to the Mother Superior.
1. Anita Ekberg as The Killer Nun
Anita Ekberg stars as Sister Gertrude in the Italian-produced nunsploitation film The Killer Nun. Sister Gertrude is one saucy sister with sexy blonde hair, killer blue eyes, and a thirst for bloody revenge. Following botched brain surgery, Sister Gertrude becomes a heroin addict, has a lesbian affair with another nun and takes steps to seek revenge on the man who ruined her happiness. The film is full of sex, violence, and ungodly behavior. The Killer Nun was so controversial that it was banned in the UK until 2006.
Bonus: Megan Fox as Sister Teresa
Sadly, this is not a real film (if it was it’d be number one on the list). Rather it’s a parody trailer used to promote Fox’s little seen film How to Lose Friends & Alienate People.